The Whole 30 – Day 8 OVER 9000!!

For the record, I never watched Dragon Ball Z.  But I feel weird.  Not in a bad way mind you.  I feel more awake, more energized than I have in a while.  Don’t get me wrong, when my body is done or it gets late I still pass out, but no longer do I feel the need to do it in the middle of the day.  Which is big because I used to be able to fall asleep at the drop of a hat, cat naps were a close personal friend of mine.

I am still meaning to get exercise back into my routine.  I’m sure I’d be losing even more if I did that but after working at 4am yesterday (see my last blog) and all the running around I did I was properly wiped out.  So nothing yesterday and today was kind of a mess too so that didn’t happen and tomorrow I’m going to be in a class all day.  I know, i know, excuses right?  Life’s busy I just gotta make the time.  Like Torah study, exercise should have a set time it is done regularly.  For the record I’m also not the most studious of jews so…..

Something has been bothering me for a while.  It’s a bit personal so I won’t go into details, but maybe talking about it here will help me work through it a bit.  Have you ever believed something so strongly that you couldn’t shake it?  I’m being told, on some level, to let it go, that to fight it would serve no purpose and only make things worse.  But if I back down from this I won’t be letting it go, and it will only build more anger and resentment as a result.  Because I feel it in my soul, that the position I hold is right and what happened was wrong under any circumstances and an accounting has to be made.  And if I have to fight the good fight alone, I will, and endure the consequences.  I’ve never been one to bare grudges nor stay angry for long but in this instance I can’t shake it, and I think that says something.

I think of the words of the hardest working man in country music, Aaron Tippen:

You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything

You have to be your own man, not a puppet all with strings 

Never compromise what’s right, and uphold your family name

You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything


The Whole 30 – Day 7 4 AM wake up

4 am is always rough.  Rougher even still if you are doing this program.  I don’t normally “sleep” so much as nap that night.  Then off to work.  I managed to make it to 8:30 without having a typically consumed energy drink or other type of sugar product.  Boiled eggs, fruit salad and a larabar were my reward for waiting to eat.  Funny thing was as I was pushing some candy later that day I started to look at the nutrition facts on each package, doing the math on the amount of sugar truely in each package.  They really should put the measurement in teaspoons especially for Americans. Who can visuallize a gram unless you have experience in purchasing narcotics?

At a Wegmans run with the wife we realized a program which is typically criticized for being expensive would actually cause us to come under budget for the month on groceries.  How you might ask?  I wasn’t buying sodas and snacks which nickle and dimed our budget.  I always had a problem with that when it came to finances.  It was never big purchases.  I always found myself spending a little here and a little there a bunch of times and would look up and have spent $200 in a month.

Also, today I was able to get into a polo shirt I had given up on some time ago.  That felt really good.  I put it on and not only did it fit, there was room to spare!  After one week!  I’m enjoying the results of this program everyday.  I might even lose the twenty pounds the doctor said I needed to!

I’m going to keep this short and just say I am excited to see where this journey will take me.  I’ve been up since 3:15 am so I’m going to pass out.

In the words of John Green, “Don’t forget to be awesome”.

The Whole 30 – Day 5/6 Issues with Shabbat

Oh Shabbos.  Here I was going to have a bit of a problem.  For those unaware, on the Sabbath I am required to eat bread (typically challah) and make a blessing over a cup of wine, which I then drink.  Do you know what is NOT compliant to this program?  So I had the minimum requirement of bread and wine (like really small you guys trust me it probably didn’t do much damage) and watched my family enjoy warm rolls and hummus before our meal.  😒

Also this is the day most my drinking takes place, and it didn’t help that at shul (yiddish for synagogue) there was not one but TWO bottles of whiskey, and not the cheap stuff, like, good quality booze too.  *groan*  And lets not forget kiddush (after services we have snacks and drinks out for schmoozing afterwards) which had literally zero things for me to eat…unless you count herring…which I don’t…yuck.  So there I am with my Larabar while everyone else is chowing down on cookies, brownies, chips, and ICE CREAM!  Bite me.

But I wasn’t exhausted like I typically am on a shabbat afternoon.  Usually I nod off in my chair for a bit or actually crash in my bed but I didn’t.  I guess that’s a good sign.  Or maybe it’s because I wasn’t drinking.  

The wife and I finished a book we’ve been reading called “Start” by Jon Acuff.  If you haven’t had the chance to read it I highly recommend it, especially if you are trying to find a path to awesome for yourself.  Even if you aren’t or you are already on a path to awesome read it anyways, he’s hilarious.  

I feel like at this point I should say something profound or insightful.  There’s no reason, I just feel as though I need to drop some wisdom that I’ve gleaned in my first week.  But I don’t have any, at least not anything earth shattering.  Any process takes time and takes discipline especially when it comes to self improvement.  Whether it’s quitting a bad habit, building healthy eating routines, or sitting with a therapist to get an unbiased ear to hear your problems, it’s not an overnight thing.  And I think my generation has forgotten what that means.  We were raised on MTV with the attention span of a music video that has only gotten shorter.  I think what we need, more than patience, is a little grace.  My wife is one who lacks patience and wants something done, or to happen, not just now but yesterday.  She freely admits this and we joke about it, but it’s something that not only speaks to those with impatience but also in dealing with the world and its stress.  Give yourself that grace, take a deep breath, and take one step forward at a time, no matter how small it may be.

That seems pretty profound, don’t you think?  At least it sounded that way.  At least profound enough to end up on an office motivational poster. 

Maybe with a picture of kittens.  And who doesn’t love kittens?

The Whole 30 – Day 4 Who Remembers Ristar?

Because I sure didn’t, that is until I broke out my Sega retro game system, you know the types with 30 games built into it?  After the kids finished their homework I broke it out for some old school side scrolling action.  

Now I know this is supposed to be about me and my Whole 30 journey, why am i talking about a game that came out 22 years ago (1995 people, FEEL OLD!!).  But that’s just it, today I felt pretty good.  I had a bit of a headache and some crankiness this morning but that was mostly due to needing to eat but having to deal with my kids before I could do that.  Man, I just gotta get up earlier and make sure I eat.  I had a bit of a fight with my toddler’s shoes (seriously, either these shoes need redesigning or my boy’s just got some fat feet) but after that I’ve had a pretty good day today.  I will say this, I’m getting a little tired of potatoes….which if you knew me would be a shock because I’m like Samwise Gamgee up in this B when it comes to a potato.

But what’s the deal with Ristar you ask?  (Ok, you’re not asking but let’s pretend like you are so I can justify talking about it)  Well part of this process has been getting off of Facebook for the week.  Getting away from the negativity and distraction it was becoming.  Now I’m getting things done and when I have down time I’m doing things I’ve been meaning to do, like play old 90s Sega games or write in this blog.  I still reach for my phone like I did before but no longer is the app there to intice me to waste entire blocks of my day.  

I want to save a little money and buy a model set to work on.  I bought a simple set with a bit of my holiday money and had a good time with it.  I think I’d buy a few more of the basic sets before investing in paints and cement and getting a little more hardcore with it.  I can’t decide if that’s a sign of regression into childhood or that I’m becoming one of those old men who like to do model car sets and then display them in my study/office/man cave.  

But it all goes back to this process.  Now I’m wondering if I want to get the app back on my phone at all.  I do miss funny memes, which my wall is covered in.  I don’t miss all of the negativity that created a swirl of imaginary arguments in my head that was giving me anxiety and keeping me up at night.  Don’t ask.  

Rereading that last bit…I wish the person writing it wasn’t me, because then I would feel ok telling that person to stop being overly sensitive and remember it’s just Facebook, just the internet, and it’s not that important.  And most of the time I do remember that and can get on with my life.  But in an age where people joke that nothing is serious until it’s updated on Facebook, that a Tweet can stir up the media into a frenzy, and I can order everything I need online and have it delivered to my home via drones while I sit on the toilet…how unimportant is the virtual world now?  How much of “reality” is in the material world and how much is online?  Are we raising a generation of overly sensitive babies…or were we exposing those babies to an overload of stimuli too early, with a brain not yet evolved enough to handle it?  This is why I truely enjoy Shabbat, to unplug from the world, even if it’s just for a day.  Maybe I’m a little old fashioned but I think we could all use a Shabbat once a week, jew and gentile alike.  

Try it out, take a day a week and don’t check your email.  Don’t answer the phone.  Don’t go on social media.  Reconnect with those around you.  Spend time with your kids.  Take the wife out for the night.  Go fishing with an old friend.  Or take a much needed nap on your couch.

But if you get the chance, definitely revisit Ristar, it’s a fun little game.

The Whole 30 – Day 3 Detox at work

Remember when I said that I had started waking up properly hungry?  Yeah that doesn’t work so well when I haven’t built a good routine to get up and actually have breakfast before work.  So you would bring it to work, right?  Except I work in retail and I can’t  just go in and eat, got things to do.  Now I’m hungry, I have a migraine, and cranky.

And EVERYONE wanted to get on my nerves.  Constantly calling me.  Also no payroll meant no team in the store to help.  I wanted to throw my walkie against a wall.  Then I have to put on a good face for visitors from our District office.  Of course the whole time they are there I’m like “GTFO!!”

*groan*

But I’m still finding mornings are the roughest.  Once I’m through lunchtime the headaches lessen and my mood evens out.  I’m hoping to get through this detox period in a few days.  On an up note I don’t feel bloated like I have in the past so here’s hoping that’s a sign things are going in the right direction.

The hardest thing for me is going to be what happens at the end if this, and that is probably my biggest fear in this.  I’ve done programs before, lost weight and got healthy…and then slipped back into old, bad eating habits.  Maybe it was a holiday that i never bounced back from or I was super stressed and ate something bad for me, and then again, and then again.  Sometimes your worst enemy is yourself I suppose.  

But every great story needs a villain, right?  Who better than yourself?  

The Whole 30 – Day 2 It Begins

So last night I’m at work and I was feeling pretty good.  I even had the thought that I would be able to get through this whole thing without any real side effects.  

How dumb am I.  (Wait….don’t answer that)

I woke up hungry.  For the record that doesn’t happen very often.  Usually I’m not hungry until later in the morning, but all I could think about this morning was shuffling the kids off to school so I could make myself something to eat.  About an hour after eating it hit.  The migraine of detox.  I was supposed to set up a doctors appointment but after holding on the phone for a few minutes I couldn’t listen to the ringing any longer.  I tried to go on their website but asking me to fill out a bunch of forms was just pissing me off, so i gave up on the endeavor for the day.

I wonder if the morning is when it’ll hit the hardest, since it’s in the early part of the day I normally intake the majority of my sugar.  I do know it is making my usually vasting patience incredibly short, so much so that I had to warn the kids at dinner that night.  My wife compares it to having PMS.  How do y’all even function?

The only thing keeping me from murdering people when I’m around snacks now are a handful of unshelled sunflower seeds.  

(And by the by I’m writing this the morning of day 3 so I am struggling through this posting, I may have to continue on some of my thoughts for the next one)

The Whole 30 – Day 1 aka Pie Day

We watched “That Sugar Film” last night.  If you haven’t seen it I highly recommend it as a great look at sugar in our culture, not unlike “Fed Up”.  So this morning I started out with what I had in the house since I hadn’t been to the store.  Scrambled eggs, potatoes…maybe salsa?  I went to grab my favorite salsa from the fridge, decided to check the ingredients.

Sugar.  In my salsa.  Why?  Salsa is supposed to be spicy!!  Not sweet!! Well there goes that joy from my life.  Ok, no worries, I’ll grab a pickle.  Check the list of ingredients.  Ok, nothing that seems overtly sugary but there is stuff listed here that I can’t identify.  Go on the internet to see what it is aaaaannnnddddd it’s a sugar.  An artificial sugar no less.  IN MY PICKLES!!  IN.  MY.  PICKLES. 

After breakfast I went to my phone to hop on Facebook.  Then remembered I had uninstalled it.  So I scanned through Youtube, checked stats on here, and then did something truely exciting.

Cleaned out my fridge.

I’m reminded of a bit from comedian Chris Porter about not posting about such activities unless you found a brick of cocaine.  Since I didn’t I won’t go into anymore detail than that.  What I will say is that without the distraction and false dopemine causing Facebook on my phone I feel the need to do stuff.  Amazing, I know.

Later that morning, with shopping list in hand, I headed to the grocery store to stock up.  I’m sure I’m not the first to notice but shopping takes a bit longer when you are looking for crap in your foods…and there is a ton of it out there. 

Day 1 was also Pie Day at work.  Awesome.  Everyone enjoying Hersheys Chocolate Pie, but it’s ok, I’ve got a Larabar, totally the same thing.  *sigh*

Day 1 almost over.  

P.S. Is farting alot normal in the beginning?  Asking for a friend….

The Whole 30 – Day 0

I’m not really one for New Years resolutions but after a recent doctor’s visit I have been considering my physical and mental health more and more.  My sister and her girlfriend are currently on the very en vogue Whole 30 diet/cleanse thing and apparently a discussion was had in my absence with my wife, and as most of these types of situations go, a new life choice was made for me on my behalf.  

To be fair, I had spent the day considering a diet and exercise routine for myself.  The sad thing is I know what I should and shouldn’t do and eat but I simply don’t because [insert excuse here].  The program is working well for my sister who is feeling awesome.  So what the hell.  Tonight marks the last night for a month of me eating crap and hopefully starting a full reset of my body. 

I will probably be throwing in an exercise routine, most likely DDPYoga.  For those who are unfamiliar DDPYoga is a set of resistance exercises with yoga created by former pro wrestler and heavyweight champion of the world Diamond Dallas Page, aka DDP. I was doing the program for a while and really enjoyed it and the results I got. Also, DDP is the man, so there’s that (if you’ve never seen his classic stuff from his WCW wrestling days do yourself a favor and check him out).

On top of that I am doing a little something for my mental health and I am unplugging from Facebook for a week.  Two reasons brought me to this conclusion and it began with a long conversation with a team member at work about the “Binge Generation” I belong to.  The first reason is that Facebook is a MASSIVE time waster.  I have lost hours of my life in “the scroll”, just going down all of the statuses.  Secondly, the world has lost its damn mind.  Before, during amd after this election, the UGLIEST sides of our population came out and it doesn’t seem to be any better now.  And you can’t have reasoned discourse with anyone anymore.  You try to be rational and they lose their minds.  So I’ve decided to step away for my own sanity’s sake.  I’m still on Twitter for work and Linkden for networking but that’s gonna be it for the next 7 days.

*sigh* here goes….